and am now an emotional basket case. I never once considered that getting engaged and planning a wedding would bring up so many emotions in me. I told one friend that I'm now making decisions on the wedding based on whether they make me cry or not. For instance, if a song makes me cry it must be in the wedding.
I suppose it is understandable to have such a wide range of emotions. I have spent the last 34 years under my parents' wings. I haven't lived with them since I was 17, but I have spent every birthday and Christmas and major event in our lives with them. Now along comes this man with his own family that has its own way of doing things. The thought of meshing our two lives together is incredibly exciting and makes me happy. But at the same time it is also very scary and a bit sad to consider the compromises each of us will have to make.
Also, the thought of having a boy in the house all the time is a bit overwhelming! I have lived mostly alone (with the exception of a roommate here and there) for half my life. Now I have to share my space with a boy. He is going to want a portion of my closet, the toilet seat up and full control of my remote control. Basically life is not going to be all about me anymore. I guess that could be a good thing. :-)
So there is a glimpse of some of the crazy emotions I am being overcome with on a daily basis. I am almost always happy and in a state of disbelief that Javier finally asked me to marry him and that day is coming soon! Yet, when I'm not looking these other emotions sneak up on me...fear, selfishness, sadness. I'm going to assume that these are normal for any bride.
1 comment:
I am so happy you two are getting married. It won't be easy in some ways (I know because my older son married someone from a different culture/language), but I believe that you will soon both consider your marriage to be the smartest thing either of you ever did. I'll send you my favorite wedding blessing: May your first year be the worst!
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